I am curious about this part of your response: “you’re very happy to accommodate what he needs.” Could BB decide that she may not want to accommodate his needs — and make the choice to leave the relationship? That she enjoys a social life that includes nights like these with her friends?
Definitely! But given that BB offered to cut back without her boyfriend asking or expressing that need, it seemed like she was very open to changing her behavior—she just wasn’t sure if she should
I’m glad you mentioned it, because when I was writing, I almost went down that same road and then realized she was asking only about the bf’s comfort, not her own, which made me think she wasn’t asking me to address it/was fine being amenable to what he needed.
What an excellent point about *when* she brings it up. Sometimes we forget how hard it is to be taken seriously when we’re drunk.
Such great advice that can be applied generally to any boundary issue that comes up in a relationship
I am curious about this part of your response: “you’re very happy to accommodate what he needs.” Could BB decide that she may not want to accommodate his needs — and make the choice to leave the relationship? That she enjoys a social life that includes nights like these with her friends?
Definitely! But given that BB offered to cut back without her boyfriend asking or expressing that need, it seemed like she was very open to changing her behavior—she just wasn’t sure if she should
Thanks for her reminding me of that point in her original post!
I’m glad you mentioned it, because when I was writing, I almost went down that same road and then realized she was asking only about the bf’s comfort, not her own, which made me think she wasn’t asking me to address it/was fine being amenable to what he needed.
Good advice, lady!
thank you! <3
I wonder how often is "not very often"? Her perspective and his perspective on that question? Of course, he'd have to bring it up.