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Tim Lineaweaver's avatar

I’ve been sober for forty years. In the beginning I was deeply involved in both AA and NA and these programs helped me greatly. Eventually, with a stable life and having incorporated the Steps into my daily living I found myself not needing to attend anymore. A few years ago I went out to dinner with my cousin who is in recovery and his program friend. The program guy asked how many meetings I now go to. I told him none and he was aghast and told me I’d relapse for sure being a dry drunk and all. It didn’t matter that I’d been sober for 35 years without a meeting and was as sober as he was! Kinda ruined the night!

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Bo's avatar

I also didn’t like “dry drunk” for the reason you’ve mentioned but I’m okay with “emotional sobriety” as a similar thing. Like, it’s not enough to be physically/chemically sober, you also have to be the rider on the elephant looking out for the mice and the squirrels. This is a much more moment to moment/vigilance based thing though and less of a state of being.

I’m also not currently attending meetings but that is because I’ve been in therapy and my urge to drink is basically zero these days and I have a great support network for sober friends.

Everyone has to find their own path and find what works for them through honest reflection and hard work.

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